I Agree With: 5 Reasons Jesus is funny.

5 Reasons Jesus is funny.

Jesus is funny. Well, maybe not the real Jesus, but cartoon Jesus, paintings of Jesus, and people dressed-up that look like Jesus - funny. Why is this?

5. Jesus is Anachronistic (like an old timey gold miner)
He lived 2,000 years ago, so if we see him in a modern scenario, his clothes don't fit in. If we go back to his time, we don't fit in. If we dress him in a suit, he looks funny with all that long hair.

4. Jesus knows everyone
I don't know your uncle Rick, so jokes about uncle Rick - boring. But, Jesus - the guy in my grandmother's dinning room painting who is holding the guy from Quantum leap - I know that guy - funny.


3. Jesus has an awesome Arch Enemy
Batman fought the joker, Superman fought Lex Luther; Jesus fights Satan -the guy who invented evil. With an enemy like that Jesus can't take anything too seriously.

2. Jesus is a genie
A lot of people "love" Jesus, but you know what they like a lot more than Jesus - themselves. The pop culture Jesus is around to make our lives better, which in America means: Jesus gives us things. It is no wonder that Jesus is funny; he gets us what we want, but the things we want are often bad for us, so funny ensues.*

1. Jesus has zany friends
Whether or not Jesus himself was a nut-ball, obviously, some of his preacher friends are. John Haggy and Joel Osteen are rich, famous, and completely out in left-field. If Jesus was as crazy some preachers - funny; if Jesus was normal but was stuck hanging these guys - still funny.


*Additionally, Jesus is sometimes substituted for an angel or a dead high schooler from the 1970's - funny.

I Argree With: Obama's lack of Bitch-Ass-Ness

All of a sudden several of my favorite hip hop artists have become reflective. Lil Wayne's "Misunderstood" ends with a thoughtful description of young black America's perspective on the drug problem.

This video of Diddy discussing Obama's nomination for president is such and amazing example of the plight of young black America.



I'm excited Diddy made the video, but this is the same Diddy who gave us "Vote or Die" also gave us "No Bitch-Ass-ness." No wonder black kids are so Misunderstood.

I Agree with: Killer Tomatoes

Apparently, the tomatoes in America are currently trying to poison us.

I have 2 thoughts.

One. How is it that my burger is not cheaper? I don't get what I want, but I still have to pay the same price. Dave Thomas is someplace in heaven very unhappy.


Two. There was a television cartoon called Attack of the Killer Tomatoes when I was a kid. On that show the tomatoes had teeth and ate people instead of people eating tomatoes. If this is the reason for the ban on tomatoes I support the government's decision 100%.

I Agree: The Media are Idiots!!!

I grew up in Ga.
I work as a substitute teacher.
My mother's name is Mrs. Jones.
My mother is a black woman.
I've seen women wear wigs before.
My Wife's name is Mrs. Jones.

HOWEVER
I have nothing to do with a substitute teacher, who lives in Ga, and who is named Mrs. Jones.

Stop calling my cell phone people - this is a random set of coincidences.